What Pushes My Buttons

Dancin' Fool

Before I begin...a big asshole of the day goes to the lady who blatently cut me off on the way up the stairs getting off the 6 train at 33rd street this morning. Not only did she cut me off when there was no one behind me. She then proceeded slowly up the stairs in the middle of the stairway so I could neither pass her left or right. Then when she got to the top of the stairs, she was confused about where she was so she just stopped and stood there while I almost plowed into her. Then she shuffled her feet slowly in the same direction I was heading. Thanks lady...so glad you cut me off only to not know where the fuck you're going. Smart move.

Anyway...today is Friday...which is casual Friday in my office. So that means you can wear jeans (no official verdict on whether Hawaiian shirts are allowed). However today I'm breaking the rules. I'm being a rebel. I'm wearing shorts. Yes shorts. Why? Because why should guys have to suffer wearing collared shirts and pants why girls get to wear next to nothing on hot summer days. Like it's fair that I have to sweat my ass off in pants on a 90 degree day while some girl gets to wear a wife beater and a loose skirt. As Al Bundy would say...No Ma'am! Granted some may say they don't want to see a guy's flabby arms and hairy legs...and girls are much better to look at. But I have nice legs...so why shouldn't I be able to show them off too? Plus there's next to no ventilation in this office so I'd be a much more productive employee at a cooler temperature rather then having to worry about sweating through my shirt and pants. So today, shorts it is unless someone has the guts to tell me otherwise. I think I smell a reform in the workplace coming on. Men of the world UNITE!

So I was shocked to see that Akeelah didn't win the spelling bee last night. I knew it was rigged! But I got home in time to watch the last finalists duke it out. Here's one of the last contestants getting bounced from the competition.



And here's the eventual champion spelling his final word for the title.



Although if you didn't see it, the new champion, Evan O'Dorney gave one of the worst post winning interviews ever. Granted he was probably in shock. But Stuart Scott asked him what prepared him for this competition. And the kid, stumbling with a "just going through puberty like any teenage boy would voice" was like...umm...i like math...and the construction of math equations helped me learn how to break down words. It was painful to listen too. I actually turned the TV off. Poor kid. But congrats to him. You're now gonna be forever known as that Spelling Bee kid. Good luck getting your ass kicked in High School...see how fast you can spell wedgie.

The other painful TV moment last night came during Do You Think You Can Dance. I flipped through the channels just in time to see this doozy of an audition:



Um...yeah...she got moves that's for sure. She put Chris Brown too shame fa shizzle for nizzle. Although what you missed in this clip was Shane (one of the judges) saying...Do you know this competition? Do you know what we're looking for? The girl shook her head no. We're looking for athletic dancers. Not overweight dancers. You're gonna get killed on this show.

Ouch...brutually honest. Had this been American Idol there would have been a huge uproar. But since no one is watching Think You Can Dance, I'm sure not a peep will be made. Not even from the Fat Persons of America Coalition. But definitely a very "holy crap did he just say that" TV moment right there. Good stuff.

Anyway, it's Friday. The weekend is here. Time to slather on that tanning oil or SPF 2000 and soak up some rays...and some alcohol! Remember, as this sign says:


Your liver is evil and must be destroyed!

Enjoy your weekend everyone!