My big fat Greek New Years

Firstly happy New Year's too all! Hope the holiday season treated you all well.

My New Year's Eve was very entertaining. The night started with some drinks and appetizers and led to a restaurant in Astoria (which I hold off from mentioning in case they decide to send us a bill). Let's just say (without naming names) that three out of the six of us got a little sick (not me) in the restaurant bathroom, leading two out of the six to leave the restaurant shortly after appetizers arrived.

Anyway, sparing you all of the sickly details, the rest of the evening was actually pretty entertaining, despite the fact that we knew no one else in the restaurant and apparently everyone else there knew each other or knew the waitresses and owners. So it basically felt like we were crashing someone's wedding, especially since most patrons were dressed in suits and dresses (and we were their white trash cousins dressed in sweaters and jeans). There was live music with an acoustic guitar duo singing traditional Greek folk songs and eventually some of the restaurant patrons started dancing to said traditional Greek folk songs which led to more Greek traditions. But before I get into that let me just rave about the food for a moment.

The food was exceptional and arrived in droves. A greek salad arrived alongside shrimp that was placed in a phyllo pastry puff, a plate of grilled sausage and marinated meatballs. Unfortunately it was already 10:30pm by the time apps had arrived and we wouldn't see our main courses until well after midnight.

Like 45 minutes after midnight.

However despite our stomachs on revolt and the novelty of making noise with party favors wore off, the main courses didn't disappoint. We were treated to lamb, shrimp and steak. Being that this was authentic greek, I went straight for the lamb which was tender and juicy. Forgoing knife and fork, I grabbed said chop in my grubby paws and went to town (my apologies for the shitty pics my camera phone took).


Lamb


Steak

Shortly after stuffing our face with meaty goodness out came the dessert. Needless to say I was all over the baklava.



During dinner and dessert is when the dancing started. It was entertaining watching everyone dance around in circles, with their arms held high snapping their fingers.



But then the most unexpected thing happened (which I later found out was another Greek tradition). Some of the men in the restaurant started making it rain (the first three are videos - click to play).









I found out that throwing money around is a way to garner wealth and prosperity in the coming year.

Granted these guys were only throwing wads of singles in the air, but by the time we were ready to leave there had to be a few hundred dollars worth of singles on the floor.

Crazy times. Those greeks know how to party!

Dancin' Fool

Before I begin...a big asshole of the day goes to the lady who blatently cut me off on the way up the stairs getting off the 6 train at 33rd street this morning. Not only did she cut me off when there was no one behind me. She then proceeded slowly up the stairs in the middle of the stairway so I could neither pass her left or right. Then when she got to the top of the stairs, she was confused about where she was so she just stopped and stood there while I almost plowed into her. Then she shuffled her feet slowly in the same direction I was heading. Thanks lady...so glad you cut me off only to not know where the fuck you're going. Smart move.

Anyway...today is Friday...which is casual Friday in my office. So that means you can wear jeans (no official verdict on whether Hawaiian shirts are allowed). However today I'm breaking the rules. I'm being a rebel. I'm wearing shorts. Yes shorts. Why? Because why should guys have to suffer wearing collared shirts and pants why girls get to wear next to nothing on hot summer days. Like it's fair that I have to sweat my ass off in pants on a 90 degree day while some girl gets to wear a wife beater and a loose skirt. As Al Bundy would say...No Ma'am! Granted some may say they don't want to see a guy's flabby arms and hairy legs...and girls are much better to look at. But I have nice legs...so why shouldn't I be able to show them off too? Plus there's next to no ventilation in this office so I'd be a much more productive employee at a cooler temperature rather then having to worry about sweating through my shirt and pants. So today, shorts it is unless someone has the guts to tell me otherwise. I think I smell a reform in the workplace coming on. Men of the world UNITE!

So I was shocked to see that Akeelah didn't win the spelling bee last night. I knew it was rigged! But I got home in time to watch the last finalists duke it out. Here's one of the last contestants getting bounced from the competition.



And here's the eventual champion spelling his final word for the title.



Although if you didn't see it, the new champion, Evan O'Dorney gave one of the worst post winning interviews ever. Granted he was probably in shock. But Stuart Scott asked him what prepared him for this competition. And the kid, stumbling with a "just going through puberty like any teenage boy would voice" was like...umm...i like math...and the construction of math equations helped me learn how to break down words. It was painful to listen too. I actually turned the TV off. Poor kid. But congrats to him. You're now gonna be forever known as that Spelling Bee kid. Good luck getting your ass kicked in High School...see how fast you can spell wedgie.

The other painful TV moment last night came during Do You Think You Can Dance. I flipped through the channels just in time to see this doozy of an audition:



Um...yeah...she got moves that's for sure. She put Chris Brown too shame fa shizzle for nizzle. Although what you missed in this clip was Shane (one of the judges) saying...Do you know this competition? Do you know what we're looking for? The girl shook her head no. We're looking for athletic dancers. Not overweight dancers. You're gonna get killed on this show.

Ouch...brutually honest. Had this been American Idol there would have been a huge uproar. But since no one is watching Think You Can Dance, I'm sure not a peep will be made. Not even from the Fat Persons of America Coalition. But definitely a very "holy crap did he just say that" TV moment right there. Good stuff.

Anyway, it's Friday. The weekend is here. Time to slather on that tanning oil or SPF 2000 and soak up some rays...and some alcohol! Remember, as this sign says:


Your liver is evil and must be destroyed!

Enjoy your weekend everyone!

Southern Hospitality

So spent my weekend in rootin’ tootin’ Nashville. Cool city - fun filled and action packed. We had our Field & Stream Total Outdoorsman Challege at Bass Pro Shops in Nashville on Saturday so that was entertaining watching these guys compete. Unfortunately didn’t get a chance to visit Graceland to bust out my Elvis impersonation, but an Elvis impersonator did come into the bar on Saturday night. Although he was wearing a red plaid jacket. I turned my head to the group I was standing with and said “Elvis didn’t wear plaid, did he?” Need to investigate that a bit more.

We stayed at this 5 star hotel called The Hermitage. Awesome place. Everything in the place was treated with white glove service, right from the top hat and coat tailed bellhops to the marble encased bathroom counter and floors. The lobby was exquisite with a huge arched ceiling and chandeliers galore.


The lobby of the Hermitage

The bedroom was awesome as well, with a king sized bed with at least 800 tread count silk bedsheets and soft down comforter and pillows. The bathroom was huge as well, with a sunken tub and separate glass doored standing shower. They even had a separate room for the toilet. Yep, a separate little room. Cool stuff. Just an awesome hotel all around and just a few blocks from downtown Nashville. And affordable too…my room rate was only $249 a night (which for a 5 star hotel is really good!)


The down comfortable and silken bed sheets await

I happened to grab dinner at the hotel one night at their bar (The Oak Bar). I of course went for the traditional Fried Green Tomatoes which were outstanding. They looked and tasted just like crab cakes. Delicate enough to cut with a fork but meaty enough to withstand the breading I can tell you "FGT" is definitely worth all of the hype!



Just like the watching movie, I cried tears of joy eating some Fried Green Tomatoes

I also treated myself to some Fried Quail in a Jack Daniels demi-glaze. It tasted like a sweet and sour fried chicken – unreal. The bartender said their fried quail dish is their answer to chicken wings down there. I’d have to agree. I think I would’ve eaten the bone if it was edible – it was that tasty! Paired with a local brew called Yazoo – and you had yourself a great dinner worthy of a Rachel Ray Yum-O (more on her in a bit).

We went out on Broadway in Nashville on Saturday night, which is almost like a Carson City meets Times Square meets the Vegas strip. It’s basically a three block radius filled with bright lights, street performers and bars galore. Downtown Nashville is hoping on a weekend night, with most of the bars having long waits just to enter. Each bar has their own band playing and for the most part they are no-frills kind of places with people drinking, dancing, hootin and hollerin as the band cranks out country rock and blues classics. We visited both Lola’s Bluegrass Inn and The Stage in Nashville. Both places were hoppin but The Stage was truly packed. There must have been 300-400 people jammed in their. Looked like a Frat house party with an open pit of people rocking away and a balcony for those who wanted to oversee the action from above. Although I'm disappointed we didn’t hit any Honky Tonk bars so didn’t get to see any line dancing or any boot scootin booging going on. But nonetheless, I’d definitely recommend visiting Nashville if you’re looking to spend a fun weekend away.


The Stage in Downtown Nashville

And about that whole stereotype about people marrying young in the South. I had known it has existed but to see it first hand was eye-opening. Literally everyone over the age of 18 was married down there. The 24 year old worker at Bass Pro Shops was upset that it took her that long to get married since she looks “old now”. Are you kidding? Then again compared to everyone else who was married down there she did look old. Out at the bar there was a bachelorette party. The bride to be was maybe 21 at most. All of her bridesmaids were around the same age as well. Not one of them didn’t have an engagement or wedding ring on their finger! Unreal. I’d feel bad for anyone over the age of 25 who was single down there. It would probably mean you’ve either been divorced, widowed or you’re really the runt of the litter. It’s like in Kindergarten they tell you: Ok Billy Bob, you’re gonna marry Peggy Sue when you turn 18. Or else no grits for you. Understood mister? Crazy stuff especially coming from the Northeast where people by and large wait till they’re at least old enough to drink before we get married.

Anyway, back to Rachel Ray. Came across this hilarious video on YouTube of a montage of Rachel Ray from $40 a day. The video is cut closely so it shows her “orgasming” on camera about the food she’s eating. Pretty funny stuff if you have 2 minutes to spare while you spill your Chinese food all over your keyboard during lunch.

Lady...it wouldn't kill ya...

So last night I got on the uptown 4 train at Bowling Green and at Wall St. this rather "weighty" (to say it politely) lady sat next to me. She sat down with a bag of McDonalds on her lap and starting eating. At this point I was starving having just played racquetball for almost 2 hours so the smell of fries and burgers was making my stomach grumble. She opens the bag and I peer in. She had like 4 quarter pounders with cheese and an overflowing portion of fries. I tried not to stare as she devoured fries and burgers.

Anyway, at 14th street, a very skinny and sickly looking homeless man came onto the train looking for some change or food. I actually had no bills smaller than $20 lest I would have given him some change. The lady, seeing that the man was approaching, stuffed a hunk of burger in her mouth and rolled up her bag of McDonald's. Not sure if the guy saw her or not but as he politely asked her if she could spare some change or food, she shook her head no as she tried to chew her food slowly. The guy stared at her for a few seconds and then walked away.

I mean really...lady...it wouldn't kill you to spare one of the burgers in your bag. Unless you were bringing it home for your family...which it appeared that you weren't, I think you could've done without an extra cheeseburger. I mean I'm sure the 2,000 calories you already downed with the burgers and fries didn't come close to filling you up. But if you ever even complained about being fat...well...now you know why.

I looked at her in disbelief and disgust. A guy across from me looked at me and shook his head and we smiled. Cause he was thinking the same thing I was. You fucking fat ass...spare a fucking cheeseburger... (at least I think that's what he was thinking - it was what I was thinking). Anyway, its a good thing I had my "inner voice" working lest I would have created a messy situation. And that wouldn't have been good.

Anyway, been stuck in a land of work today so many apologies for the late blog. That and I'm heading to Nashville tomorrow for a work event. Maybe I'll run into my girl Gretchen and she can show me a rootin tootin good time down there! Although I'll need to download some country onto my iPod to get me caught up on the latest country hits. And I may have to have Bridget give me some quick line dancing lessons. I wouldn't want to be the only one not doing the "Boot Scootin' Boogie" at the bar!


"Oh get down, turn around go to town boot scootin' boogie"

Anyway...sorry for the short and sweet post for now...I'll try to give y'all something good before we hit the holiday weekend!

Oh and btw...about American Idol...TOLD YOU SO! America loves a crier!

What's it with white people and wedding dances???

Btw...what's it with white people and dancing at weddings. I'm not talking about regular "wedding song" dances as previously covered in this blog back on July 1st: http://whatpushesmybuttons.blogspot.com/2006_07_01_archive.html. I'm talking about fully choreographed wedding "dances" that seem to be all the rage these days. I mean I know everyone signs up for those cheezy dance lessons where they spent $1,000 to learn how to cha-cha or tango and they pull off one "spin" move that draws raves like they just pulled off a triple axle-triple toe loop combo from the crowd. You know what i'm talking about...no offense to my friends of course.

But those little dances are nothing compared to what's being done now. I mean I thought the groom getting carried around the dance floor to "I did it all for the nookie" at one wedding a went to was bad enough but check this out:


Are you kidding me? First of all I worked at Kutsher's. I'm all about the dirty dancing since Kutsher's and the catskills hotels are what the movie was based off of (the jewish hotels are in the catskills for those viewing "internationally"). Anyway you can tell that the guy is in this more than the girl by his facial reactions. I mean dude, look in a mirror, Patrick Swayze you're not. Good try though wearing all black. I love the look on his face when he does "the jump" with 2:50 to go. What a spaz. What he get, one centimeter off the ground? Pussy. Plus have you seen anyone dance more awkward. Really. And the part with the "backup dancers". The guy in the white shirt was obviously a better dancer than the groom and the girl in the blue skirt is a bit too animated. And that flying hold. What's the matter? Can't hold her yourself? Please. What a pansy. If you're gonna do it, do it right. Wait is that the groom kissing all the guys? (:30 seconds to go). Is he gay? Did he just give one of the guys tongue??? Has he kissed the bride at all? Hmm. I think we may have a gay groom folks, breakup at 11. I guess if i was really, really really drunk I'd semi-enjoy this whole recreation in person, and I'll give them a point on "originality". But -10 points for being dofuses. Especially since he looked like he was dressed like a bartender.

Apparently this clip came from VH1's Best Week Ever: http://www.bestweekever.tv/2007/02/28/yet-another-couple-who-makes-us-want-to-kill-ourselves/ I couldn't agree more.

Second video is even "better" in my opinion, simply because the groom is even more animated than the couple in the dirty dancing video. Actually the groom kind of looks like Paul? Hmm.


This clip too was courtesy of Best Week Ever http://www.bestweekever.tv/2007/01/31/propped-zombie-wedding-absolutely-terrifying/

You have to sit through the 1st minute to get to the dancing. But I don't know what's more pathetic. That this groom is being all serious about it (look at his face the whole time!). Or that they took the time to rehearse it. With 1:04 left he's singing the song. Out loud. Oh my god, it is Paul (sorry Paul I could see you doing this though). Especially with how animated he is. I'll give them a few bonus points for choreography but -10 points for not dancing with the red studded vest on. If you're gonna do thriller, do it right dammit.

But what bothers me about both these clips is that the people thought they were the best dancers since Fred Astaire. And now thanks to the instant glorification YouTube gives you, their false confidence is even more inflated since "millions" of people can now view them. Stupid YouTube. It's crap like this that makes Americans so unproductive in the workplace. At least it's giving me some good blogging fodder! (kudos to Deanene for the sending along the two videos above).