Thursday, March 01, 2007

What's it with white people and wedding dances???

Btw...what's it with white people and dancing at weddings. I'm not talking about regular "wedding song" dances as previously covered in this blog back on July 1st: I'm talking about fully choreographed wedding "dances" that seem to be all the rage these days. I mean I know everyone signs up for those cheezy dance lessons where they spent $1,000 to learn how to cha-cha or tango and they pull off one "spin" move that draws raves like they just pulled off a triple axle-triple toe loop combo from the crowd. You know what i'm talking offense to my friends of course.

But those little dances are nothing compared to what's being done now. I mean I thought the groom getting carried around the dance floor to "I did it all for the nookie" at one wedding a went to was bad enough but check this out:

Are you kidding me? First of all I worked at Kutsher's. I'm all about the dirty dancing since Kutsher's and the catskills hotels are what the movie was based off of (the jewish hotels are in the catskills for those viewing "internationally"). Anyway you can tell that the guy is in this more than the girl by his facial reactions. I mean dude, look in a mirror, Patrick Swayze you're not. Good try though wearing all black. I love the look on his face when he does "the jump" with 2:50 to go. What a spaz. What he get, one centimeter off the ground? Pussy. Plus have you seen anyone dance more awkward. Really. And the part with the "backup dancers". The guy in the white shirt was obviously a better dancer than the groom and the girl in the blue skirt is a bit too animated. And that flying hold. What's the matter? Can't hold her yourself? Please. What a pansy. If you're gonna do it, do it right. Wait is that the groom kissing all the guys? (:30 seconds to go). Is he gay? Did he just give one of the guys tongue??? Has he kissed the bride at all? Hmm. I think we may have a gay groom folks, breakup at 11. I guess if i was really, really really drunk I'd semi-enjoy this whole recreation in person, and I'll give them a point on "originality". But -10 points for being dofuses. Especially since he looked like he was dressed like a bartender.

Apparently this clip came from VH1's Best Week Ever: I couldn't agree more.

Second video is even "better" in my opinion, simply because the groom is even more animated than the couple in the dirty dancing video. Actually the groom kind of looks like Paul? Hmm.

This clip too was courtesy of Best Week Ever

You have to sit through the 1st minute to get to the dancing. But I don't know what's more pathetic. That this groom is being all serious about it (look at his face the whole time!). Or that they took the time to rehearse it. With 1:04 left he's singing the song. Out loud. Oh my god, it is Paul (sorry Paul I could see you doing this though). Especially with how animated he is. I'll give them a few bonus points for choreography but -10 points for not dancing with the red studded vest on. If you're gonna do thriller, do it right dammit.

But what bothers me about both these clips is that the people thought they were the best dancers since Fred Astaire. And now thanks to the instant glorification YouTube gives you, their false confidence is even more inflated since "millions" of people can now view them. Stupid YouTube. It's crap like this that makes Americans so unproductive in the workplace. At least it's giving me some good blogging fodder! (kudos to Deanene for the sending along the two videos above).


James said...

haha...nice dude....good finds.

younghova said...

off the heezie for sheezie...white peeple ain't got no style

neil from the uk said...

we're too proper to do stupid stuff like that in england

Anonymous said...

Where's the beegees soundtrack on this page???

Roger said...

Holy crap...that's terrible. I think I'd have to break my friends legs if they started doing this at their weddings. Times like this makes me actually want to see the Electric Slide!

Anonymous said...

awful...just awful.