Wednesday, March 07, 2007

Do you work out in the nude?

Only when I'm naked (a little National Lampoon's Loaded Weapon I reference for you to start your Wed morning).

Anyway, I was ready to have this whole blog posting about the rules of pedestrian engagement and a proposed new system I have to penalize people who perform annoying or stupid pedestrian acts, but I came across something more disturbing that derailed my train of thought for the time being (but no worries...the pedestrian story will be unveiled very soon!).

Apparently, a gym in the Netherlands decided to open up Sunday's as a nude workout day. Yes, nude. I mean not that this would happen anywhere besides the Netherlands (actually, strike that, it would probably happen in any country who embraced nudity unlike the good ole' prudish U.S.A or most Middle Eastern countries where even exposing an eyelid is forbidden). But not too shocking that this was transpiring in the Netherlands.

Nude gym goer in the Netherlands

Now, while this is very disturbing in many ways, including seeing some guys junk flying all over the place while he's on the treadmill, if a gym wants to have a naked day so be it. You may not find me there, unless it was supermodel day or something. Then again I'm not in any shape to be seen in a gym, let alone workout naked. But if you're the kind of person that would enjoy such a thing take a trip to the Netherlands sometime. At least you'd save having to purchase a gym locker for the day!

Although I do have some issues with this whole naked thing.

Issue 1) I'd want whatever equipment I was using fully sterilized after a naked person used it. I don't need to sit on a bike naked that some naked ass already sat on. The bike would be all sweaty and have ass residue. I don't need that shit (literally). So I'd want some lysol, formula 409 and any other type of industrial strength cleaner at my disposal.

Issue 2) What happens if you're lifting weights??? Is the person spotting you fully nude as well? I mean at that point you're practically getting teabagged by the person spotting you. Like I want to look up and see some guys hairy balls dangling in front of my face while I'm bench pressing. No thanks. (Side note: Actually I think I just grossed myself out, which is pretty hard for me to do.)

Issue 3) For those that attach their ipods to their clothes. Where do they put them? I guess an armband is fine...or at least the shuffle can clip onto your nipples. No comment. I'm still disturbed by the bench pressing teabag reference.

Ok...yeah, on that note...end of discussion. This naked gym thing is a bad...baaaaad idea.


Roger said...

sick dude...i almost lost my breakfast

Anonymous said...

dude...thanks for the disgusting image. jackass.

neil from the uk said...

Look...there's the line...and oh, you just crossed over it.

aussieblogger said...

mate...i was doing ok until that whole teabagging line. some things are better left unsaid!

Anonymous said...

The disturbed meter just went up and through the roof.

Chris said...

Sorry to gross everyone out...just saying what everyone else is afraid to ask!

James said...

I haven't read in a few days and now i read a warning label on your blog post next time. Like, naked man below, don't read any further.