What Pushes My Buttons

Pizza Pizza

So our friends at the ACLU (that would be the Ass Clowns Leaveusthefuckalone Union) are at it again. This time they've produced a very tongue-in-cheek example of what ordering pizza could be like in the year 2010. (click link or image to play)



Basically the guy calls up his local pizzeria, the Pizza Palace, and they have his whole history on file, including his health conditions (among them impotence - very funny ACLU) and a warning from his insurance provider that the Double Meat Special pizza he wants is bad for him and thus he'll have to pay an extra "Health Surcharge" for his pies.

Now while this is meant to be nothing more than a "holy shit, let's stop this from happening now" fluff piece from our favorite Asshole Cleaning Lickers Union, it could very well happen in the not so distant future. Especially if that whole "GoogleZon" idea ever comes to fruition.

But for now, take heart that invasion of privacy such like this is probably way down the road. So don't listen to what the "We do more harm in the world than good" cocksuckers have to say.

In fact we should concentrate on more important things than trying to find "civil liberties" for humankind. Like, for example, eliminating the sounds of farts in public. Now THAT'S something we can all get 'behind' right?

Well now we can. All we need to do is purchase some Toot Tones and all of our pesky fart noises would turn into cheerful, harmless cell phone rings!



Now all we need to do is find a way to turn our 'gas emissions' into some sort of usable environmentally friendly substance that could fuel our automobiles. Now that would be extemely practicable! Just think, when you can say "I have enough gas in me to get me to Pittsburgh", you could really mean it!