What Pushes My Buttons

What a relief!

Whew! In case you haven’t heard, according to DNA testing Larry Birkhead was declared to be Dannielynn’s father (Anne Nicole Smith’s daughter)! Thank god that ordeal is over with, I was so sick and tired of being questioned about my relationship with Anna Nicole. I mean, so we shared one wild and drunken night downing a bottle of Hypnotiq and popping some Trim Spa. That was like 7 years ago! Get over it. It was impossible for me to be the father!! Fuckin idiots.


Anna after our night of partying several years ago. I told ya I wasn't the baby's daddy!

Anyway, I happened to catch the tail end of American Idol last night. I really haven’t watched the show in a few seasons (ever since I called the whole Taylor Hicks winning season in my very first blog). I caught Sanjaya’s song and the recap of the other contestants. Even though I know there’s the whole "keep Sanjaya on even though he sucks conspiracy", I gotta say he wasn’t that bad last night. The song suited him perfectly, even with that porn star moustache he was flaunting last night.


If Idol doesn’t work out, Sanjay can appeal in some sleazy Cuban mafia movies

In the recaps, I wasn’t really wowed with the other performers. Then again, J-Lo was their “teacher” this week, and we’ve seen the great decisions she’s made with her life recently! First there was Gigli and now she’s married to a rat.


I don’t think J-Lo is qualified to give advice given the decisions she’s made in life recently

I would say the last good thing J-Lo's done was star in the Wedding Planner. Although Matt McConaughy really stole that movie from her. And the only reason I’d say she was "good" in that movie was the one line she had about M&M’s: "I only eat the brown ones because they’re pure" (which is much funnier when I say it in my Rosie Perez accent from White Men Can't Jump).

Anyway, if I had to pick my American Idol favorite this season based on the auditions and the little that I’ve seen of the show, I’d go with the beat boxing Blake (who doesn’t love a beat-boxer!). Especially with the popularity of J.T. right now, Blake could be riding Justin's coat tails a bit. I know LaKiesha and Melinda are the two most talented singers, although can you see the American public voting in a “Doo-little” as their Idol? Dunno about that. Anyway, Sanjaya wasn’t half bad last night so I think that the conspiracy phenomenon definitely lives on this week. Especially after Simon gave him a disgruntled, half-hearted “that wasn’t so bad” feedback on his performance. I think either Richardson goes or the girl who was wearing close to nothing goes But then again I haven’t really followed the show this season so I don’t know who is getting the “popular” vote.